Stories Behind 10 TV Theme Songs

1. "Suicide is Painless" - M*A*S*H*

The song was written by Robert Altman's son, Mike Altman, when he was only 14 years old. The tune was written by Johnny Mandel, a musician who worked with Count Basie, Frank Sinatra and Peggy Lee (among others). Mandel sings the song as well. When Altman wrote the lyrics, he told producer Ingo Preminger that he just wanted a guitar in return, but Preminger insisted that he be paid the regular way and set up a contract that would give Altman royalties. He ended up making more than a million dollars, at least according to his dad, who directed the movie. Incidentally, Robert only received $75,000 for directing it.

2. "Those Were The Days" - All in the Family

According to series producer Norman Lear, the reason Carroll O'Connor and Jean Stapleton sang the theme song themselves was simply to save costs. Although it was the same thing at the beginning of every episode, there were a few different versions. In one, Archie hugs Edith at the end. In another, Edith smiles at Archie and he returns the look with one of irritation. And we shouldn't be surprised that the lyrics and music were so memorable: songwriting duo Charles Strouse and Lee Adams were very good at their jobs, having already won a couple of Tony Awards (Bye Bye Birdie and Applause). Another interesting tidbit: after the theme song aired for the first few times, viewers wrote in and complained that they couldn't understand what the actors were supposed to be saying, especially the line "Gee our old LaSalle ran great." If you've ever wondered why that line is so clearly enunciated in the theme song, that's why - Jean Stapleton recorded her part again and made sure to speak ridiculously clearly during those words.

3. "The Addams Family Theme" - The Addams Family

Composer Vic Mizzy wrote the theme song, which is pretty well known, but what isn't as commonly known is that he wrote the theme song for another very popular sitcom from the same era. "The Munsters?" you might be wondering. Nope - the other theme song is a true testament to Mizzy's versatility - it was Green Acres. Mizzy also contributed parts to the Mr. Ed and Petticoat Junction theme songs. He still receives royalties every time The Addams Family theme is played, even when it's on an organ at a baseball game. (Photo from VicMizzy.com)

4. "The Ballad of Jed Clampett" - The Beverly Hillbillies

This tune joins the elite group of T.V. theme songs that were so popular they actually ended up on the mainstream music charts. The song was written and composed by Paul Henning, who was also the series' creator. The man who sang the song, Jerry Scoggins, was a stockbroker trying to break into the music business when he landed "The Ballad of Jed Clampett." This luck break paired him with the legendary Foggy Mountain Boys, who played the music that backed him. The Foggy Mountain Boys, Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs, were already well established in the country and bluegrass world and had been members of the Grand Ole Opry for years... which probably helped the theme song reach #44 on the charts in 1962.

5. "The Ballad of Gilligan's Isle" - Gilligan's Island

What ended up being one of the most recognizable theme songs of all time started out as a very amateur recording done in a noisy house. Sherwood Schwartz, the show's creator, couldn't afford to rent a recording studio to get the theme down, so he called in a favor from a friend with the necessary equipment. The only day they could all do it in time for the pilot was a day that his friends were preparing for a big charity event at their house, so the song had to be recorded when waiters weren't clattering silverware and plates and serving trays around. It took forever to adjust the levels just right; they finally got a usable take just as guests were arriving for the event. It's not exactly the one we know today - Sherwood had injected a sort of calypso solo that didn't make the cut - but it's the general theme. And for the first season, the portion of the lyrics that served as a roll call completely neglected poor Mary Ann and the professor, saying, "The movie star and the rest, here on Gilligan's Isle!" Schwartz said he never had an inkling that the professor and Mary Ann would become such popular characters and therefore didn't think to name them in the theme song. Although this changed by the second season, Dawn Wells and Russell Johnson liked to send each other birthday cards and presents with the signature "The Rest" as a nod to the first theme song.

6. "Happy Days" - Happy Days

For the first two seasons of the show, the theme song was simply an oldie but goodie - Bill Haley and the Comets' "Rock Around the Clock." And it served the purpose just fine - it was so popular, in fact, that the song recharted after nearly 20 years. After season two, though, they decided to use an original song instead of Bill Haley's, and fans were already familiar with it since it was being used as the closing theme music. "Happy Days" got bumped up from the end of the show to the front, and the song has been stuck in our heads ever since. It was written by Charles Fox and Norman Gimbel, who gave us the lyrics and music to a ton of other memorable theme songs: Laverne and Shirley, Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, Wonder Woman and the score for H.R. Pufnstuf. "Happy Days" was performed by a roster of studio musicians, including some of the same guys who sang The Partridge Family theme song. As popular as the Happy Days theme song was, they decided to record a new version of it for the show's final season. It didn't go over as well.

7. "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" - Cheers

The famous theme song was nearly just a recycled song from a Broadway musical called Preppies. The producers of Cheers heard it and thought it would be perfect for their new show if the lyrics were just changed up a little. Gary Portnoy and Judy Hart Angelo, the songwriters, were understandably thrilled - but the producers of Preppies weren't. They refused to give up rights to the song. Portnoy and Angelo were devastated, but the producers of Cheers told them not to worry - they should just take a shot at writing something totally new. The first version, a pretty blatant rip-off of their first song, was quickly rejected. After reading a script, the duo took a third shot, which was closer - the producers loved some of the lyrics - but still no cigar. Version #3 was rejected. Portnoy and Hart were getting a little dejected and concerned that they were going to get fired any second, and to make matters worse, Gary and his girlfriend had just broken up. This set the mood for version #4, a melancholy little tune about the Red Sox losing, being too poor to pay the electric bill and needy girlfriends who wanted to get married. They almost decided it was too depressing for a sitcom, when they came up with the line "Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name," and the whole song turned from depressing to hopeful. The folks at Cheers loved it, but changed the opening lines from "Singing the blues when the Red Sox lose, it's a crisis in your life," to the now-famous, "Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got." The rest is history.

8. "Jeannie" - I Dream of Jeannie

There were three theme songs composed for the show about a blonde genie and her Master - the first season featured an instrumental waltz over the opening credits. And no less than Carole King wrote a theme song for the series, but Sidney Sheldon rejected it. The winning song that we know as the I Dream of Jeannie theme song today was composed by Hugo Montenegro. And, believe it or not, there were lyrics to the song. Written by Buddy Kaye, this gem was never used for the show:

Jeannie, fresh as a daisy. Just love how she obeys me, Does things that just amaze me so. She smiles, Presto the rain goes. She blinks, up come the rainbows. Cars stop, even the train goes slow. When she goes by, she paints sunshine on every rafter, sprinkles the air with laughter, we're close as a quarter after three. There's no one like Jeannie. I'll introduce her to you, but it's no use sir, cause my Jeannie's in love with me.

9. "Thank You For Being a Friend" - Golden Girls

Unbeknownst to me, this song wasn't original to our four happening grannies. It was first recorded in 1978 by Andrew Gold, who hit #25 on the Billboard charts the same year. Cynthia Fee sang it for the show, though.

The song was later reworked a third time for the opening credits to The Golden Palace.

10. "The Facts of Life" - The Facts of Life

If you didn't already know this, prepared to be floored: Alan Thicke, better known as Jason Seaver to legions of kids who grew up in the late '80s and early '90s, co-wrote "The Facts of Life." He also co-wrote and sang the theme song to Diff'rent Strokes. At the time, Thicke was married to his co-writer Gloria Loring, who sang the "Facts" song you probably remember. There was also an earlier version that featured the cast of the show singing the wise lyrics, but it was only used for the first season.